Hi Spooky,
The difference in specs has to do with the difference between a crystal and an oscillator. The first sentence of your post states that you are using a crystal, but later you state that you are using an oscillator.
The AC16's internal oscillator circuitry can only drive a crystal up to 8 mHz. But the AC16 can accept an external clock up to 40 mHz. So an external oscillator of 22.1184 mHz should work.
What I can't help you with is how to tell Processor Expert whether you have a crystal or an external clock. That seems to be a separate problem.