That's a good question CHary, but unfortunately it's something you'll need to arrive at as it totally depends upon your application and data that you are transcieving. If your application is very responsive to clearing out the buffer and your data is small then you'll get away with a small buffer, and of the course the converse is true. The maximum data size of an IP Datagram is 1500 bytes.
Sounds like an interesting project BTW.
Shaun